Love Me
by Sonrisa.ERoc
Summary: Syaoron always put other's wants and needs before his own. He helped Syaoran with his little love problem with Sakura. But, with it came to his own love problems, would there be no one to help him? -A Horitsuba Gakuen Fanfic-
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the TRC/Horitsuba peoples.

Anyways, this was the short pilot chapter for "Love Me". Syaoron-centric with some Yuui and Kyle Rondart put in and appearances of other peoples every now and again. So... I've been showing scene changes by doing the 'eyecatch' thing that most animes do before/after the commercial break. You know, how it shows a pic of a character along with the name of the show and then goes into comerical. Well, I think of the whole Hetalia where one of the countries pop out and say "Hetalia" when the words 'eyecatch' is , because I suck at transitions, that's what will indicate a sort of change in the scene or time skip.

* * *

Chapter 0  
.::Nothing::.

"What are we supposed to do?  
Now that the love is gone."

-'Love is Gone' by David Guetta & Chris Willis-

A lovely aroma filled the room, giving it a sweet, delectable atmosphere, maybe that's what prompted me to wake and stir. Where could this be? Groggily, with my stomach growling and my whole body aching, the center of the throbbing pain being at my lower back, I sat up. Or, at least, attempted to. The second I managed to sit up, I came crashing back down with a soft thud. So tired and worn out. And so I simply laid there, not wanting to fight the soreness and fatigue I was feeling at that moment. What more could I do really? With an arm over my face, still damp from the tears I had shed earlier, I waited. For what, I don't even know.

Nor do I ever want to know. "Fml."

::-Horitsuba Gakuen-::

"Ah, you re awake." A voice chimed, so soft, so warm, I thought it was the voice of an angel. But of course, there were no such things. And if there were, well, how strange that would be.

I forced my amber eyes to open. The owner of the voice turned out to be Yuui-sensei. His gentle sapphire eyes glanced over me with concern, something I really was used to by now. After a few months of being overly self-conscious around him, I could tell what types of looks he gave me, his main one recently being those of concern and worry. But it seemed over the top now, too... what's the word I'm looking for... too cautious. Like he was looking at something so fragile, I had only passed out so he shouldn't be this worried over nothing. The look slowly got my brain to start forming some questions. How in the world did I end up here in the first place? Last thing I could remember was... I don't remember clearly. Why?

A sad smile appeared on Yuui-sensei's lips as he noticed the questioning look on my tear streaked face. How pathetic I must have looked. "I see. Syaoron-kun, do you remember anything that happened before waking up here?" He gently placed a hand on my head. The cool touch of his finger against my burning skin was so comforting.

But... what could that have meant? Did something happen? Did the reason explain why I had been crying?

And then that voice came back. _Who would love a thing like you? You re just a good time and nothing more. You thought I actually felt something for you? Ha, what a laugh. Idiot._

I cringed away from Yuui-sensei's touch, the desperate urge to hide behind the covers welled up in me. Feeling as if it burned me with scorn, disgust, and, what I hate most of all, pity. It was all coming back now. How could that monster have done this to me? _Silly Syaoron, you should know better._ Why me? The tears blurred my vision again but never fell. What did I do to deserve this? I didn't want to remember this. It's no wonder I didn't want to remember what happened. I would rather forget it had ever happened. I could still feel those hands as they wandered over my body. Black, cruel eyes lingering over my exposed skin. _A good time and a pretty face, but no real value._ Involuntarily, I curled up into a ball, as if I thought that somehow this position would protect me from the memories. I felt disgusting. Cheapened by that heartless bastard. Tch, as if I was good for anything anyways. Yes, I thought bitterly, who would love used goods? Who would love a stupid boy like me? _You would spread your legs for anyone. As long as you think of your special someone, who never care who fucks you._ Warm, salty liquid dripped down my sunken cheeks. How I wanted to bury myself in between the mattress and blanket, and never come out again.

But then, as I wallowed in self-pity, warm arms cradled my sad, broken form. "Don't cry." He said in such a way that... I couldn't help but feel even more miserable about everything. This wasn't supposed to happen. It should never have happened. "It wasn't your fault. I don't know what happened in there. But it wasn't your fault." I sobbed uncontrollably, for what seemed like hours, in his arms. It wasn't fair. Burying my face into his chest, curling away from the cruel reality of the world. Why me?

"I'm sorry." I mumbled, over and over. "I'm so sorry." I'm such an idiot. How could I have been so selfish and stupid?

::-Horitsuba Gakuen-::

This was bad. Bad. Bad. Bad!

"Shit."

God, how I hated life.

* * *

Like it? Hate it? "Wtf' it? Because I didn't want to rewrite too much, I just put up the pilot chapter again with some slight changes. Whether this story is further explained to those who didn't read it a few months back is up to the reviewers. Because... I'm not entirely sure if I want to put this up again.

Of course, the other chapter will be much longer than this but... yea...


	2. Delicate Feelings

**Disclaimer:** I don't own TRC/HG people. Heck, even the plot isn't totally mine. Eh….

Summary - "Syaoran and I have always been opposites in nearly everything. Did that mean when he found love, I would never? Was I doomed to stay alone? When I found trouble, no one would save me? I don't mind. I'll continue to smile no matter what because that's who I am."

* * *

Chapter 1

.::"Delicate Feelings"::.

_"Love is strong yet delicate._

_It can be broken._

_To truly love is to understand this._

_To be in love is to respect this."_

-Steven Packer

* * *

A soft sigh escapes my lips; I could only stare out the window to the wonderful day. The clear blue sky, clouds floating leisurely, the sun shining brightly, it was a truly beautiful day. Another happy day full of school and club activities, uninterrupted by bad weather, for the students attending Horitsuba Gakuen.

And I hated it. It was just too happy.

And, for some reason, nothing seemed all that important anymore. Syaoran, thank kami-sama, never asked about why I came back the next morning after the incident in Yuui-sensei's room. I don't think I could ever tell him what happened. Now that was saying something. For a twin to not share a secret? How bizarre, ne? For the two of use anyway, since all we did was share our thoughts that couldn't be told to anyone else but each other. But since it's been a few months, I had hoped he forgot all about it.

Fai-sensei drones on about the periodic table or something along those lines. I'm so far gone in my own l protective little world that I can't even pay attention to the words that fall out of his mouth. All I can think of was what happened that night. And waking up, afterwards, in Yuui-sensei's room. A blush rose onto my face. Of all the people to find me, it had to be Yuui-sensei. The urge to bang my head against the desk bubbles up in me but I choose to ignore it.

Right beside me I can feel Syaoran glance at me with looks of worry but pretend to not notice. I didn't want to notice much of anything anymore. Maybe that's what spurs him to worry.

The bell rings. Chairs scoot across the floor and paper ruffle as the students stuff their bags to leave. "Ne, minna-san, don't forget the homework over the weekend." Fai-sensei playfully warns the class as he wears a bright, happy smile on his face, waving good-bye to the students in his usually energetic fashion.

Before Syaoran can let any words asking of my well-being tumble out of his mouth, I bolt out of there.

I ran off so quickly that I manage to ram full force into someone. I close my eyes and stumble back but the person grabs my arm to prevent me from falling on my ass. Hesitantly, I open my eyes and look up at my savior. Scratch that, ex-savior. Ex-everything and anything. The very last person I want to see now stands before me.

"Hm, Syaoron-kun, clumsy as ever." The voice, sweet and soft yet laced with a cynical, taunting tone mused out. I rip my arm away from his grasp, as if his touch burned me, and give him a cold glare. He simply chuckles in pure amusement.

"Kyle-san! Wait up!" I hear a giggly girl calls out in pure giddiness. I step back a little as she rushes pass me, barely acknowledging my existence. Kyle smiles at her with that same smile he used to only give me. So kind and gentle. Filled with love. But the difference now was I knew what hid behind that smile. That so called love was fake. As the girl reaches his side, he gives her a peck on the cheek. She giggles happily with a pale pink blush on her cheeks and they go off together in happy merriment. And, as always, at the very last moment, as if somehow he can always find me, he glances back to me and smirks. Taunting me, openly mocking the fact that I still held onto to my feelings for him and rubbing it in my face what I can never have. Could never hope to have.

I sigh and head in the opposite direction. So what if he broke my heart? So what if he led me down a path of no return or redemption? So what if I gave my everything to him, only to have it thrown back in my face? Why should I care? It didn't matter anymore. It happened so long ago.

Before I knew it tears were rolling down my face. "Shit..." This wasn't good. I never cried. I couldn't let people see me like this. I was Mr. Cool-and-Amazing. People would worry more if they saw me like this. I quickly wipe away the excess tears and slap my face a little. "Can't cry here, Syaoron. Not here." I chide myself, urging the tears to stay back. If only for a little while longer…

And no sooner that I do this, a group of girls come my way. "Senpai!" They all giggle as they approach me. I manage a good half smile. Nothing over the top, but it wasn't all that fake either. But it was cynical and bitter.

"What can I help you with today?" I ask them politely. They all giggle again. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. That would be rude and so unlike me. But I was in no mood to deal with them right now. Usually I was. Heck, I would even flaunt a little to see how they'd react. Of course, they all knew I was 'unavailable' but that never stopped them.

"We just wanted to wish you good luck in the archery tournament next week." "Ganbatte!" "Do your best!" "We know you will!" And with that, they quickly left. Such strange girls. But I couldn't help but smile with a little less biterness. At least they somewhat cared about me. That was nice.

-===Horitsuba===-  
[normal P.O.V.]

"Nii-san… You ok?" Syaoran asks for what seemed like to Syaoron the bazillionth time today. But the younger brother couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong. His brother was dealing with some kind of bad thing. He just couldn't pinpoint what it was.

"Hai, hai." Syaoron repeats in a monotone voice. All while staring out the window in their little dorm room. He had been doing that a lot recent. Staring out, zoning out, hardly paying attention to anything or anyone. To the younger twin, it seems like his brother was waiting for someone. Always waiting.

Syaoran slams a book on the desk, right in front of Syaoron. "No, you are not. What's wrong?" He pleaded his brother to open up and talk. He kept his mouth shut that first few times but now he was seriously worried over Syaoron's strange behavior. Sure, Syaoron was a bit of a loner in his own little way but not to this extent!

Syaoron takes one glance up at Syaoran, a blank expression on his face. Syaoran readies himself to repeat the question again in a more stern voice.

But a knock comes from the door and interrupts their one sided conversation.

"I'll go get it." Syaoron stands from his spot at the desk. He opens the door to reveal three people. "Ah, Saku-chan. Watanuki-kun. Himawari-chan. Please, come in." He steps back to give them room to come in.

"Ne, Syaoron-kun. You're looking well today!" Himawari chimes happily as the three step in.

"Meh, Syaoron, you're hiding something aren't you." Watanuki eyes Syaoron accusingly. Syaoron simply laughs.

"Nope, nothing up my sleeves today." Syaoron promises with a charming smile, even going so far as to pull up the sleeves of his uniform to prove that nothing was there. "Jaa, Syaoran, I'm going out today. Don't wait up, k?" Syaoron calls back to his younger twin.

"Sure you can't stay for a little while, Syaoron-kun?" Sakura tilts her head to the side. "We were going to work on the project Okiura-sensei assigned us in Child & Human Development class and then work on that worksheet Fai-sensei gave us today."

Syaoron shakes his head, declining the tremendously generous offer, since he had no clue what worksheet Sakura were talking about. "I have some errands to run. Later, guys." He quickly slips out through the door.

"He's been acting so strange lately." The others nod in agreement. Syaoron always liked to be in the sidelines, watching and observing, or in a crowd of people but lately he seemed to zone out more often than normal.

"Maybe he's just a little stressed out."

"I guess." Himawari claps her hands together. "Ok, let's just go and work on that project."

-===Horitsuba===-  
[syaoron P.O.V.]

I take a deep breath and wander through the school's streets. I lied about the fact that I had errands to do. In fact, I had nowhere to go right now. No one to see, no one who would ever want to see me, nothing to do but walk.

"How boring." I mutter sadly.

I stop by the Cat's Eye Café. May as well get something to eat. It was a bit busy today so at least I wouldn't stick out like a sore thumb. But what made me feel uneasy was that most costumers were couples. Happy couples enjoying each other's company. Or maybe that was the only type of people I force myself to see…

Ignoring this little fact, I quietly slip into one of the booths.

"What can I get you?" A young girl's voice asks me. I look up and see Hanato Kobato standing beside me in the cutest waitress outfit. Who in the world thought it was a good idea to let Kobato-chan work as a waitress? She was all too clumsy. But she did provide a good vibe.

"Just some tea, Kobato-chan." I tell her with an almost sickenly sweet smile. She nods and quickly gets my order.

And while I wait for my order, I, as I always do, stare out the window. My chin in the palm of my hand and my elbow on the table, looking as nonchalant as possible.

"Ah, Syaoron-kun, mind if I join you?" A soft voice interrupts my thoughts or lack thereof. I turn my head to see Yuui-sensei. A blush creeps onto my face and I remember waking up in his room again. Quickly I turn away and shrug. He slips into the seat across from me.

"How are you feeling?" He asks attentively, as if afraid he'll hit a nerve.

I shrug, keeping my gaze on the world outside the café's window. How was a supposed to answer that? I wasn't going to tell him anything, if that's what he wanted. No one needed to know what happened that night. It was something that would always remain between me and Kyle.

But Yuui-sensei keeps on. "Won't you tell me what happened? I'm worried." And who wouldn't be? You come into a random classroom to look for some supplies and you find something like me instead. Me, nude, unconscious, bruised, with tearstains on my face, the only kind of person who wouldn't worry over something like that would be a cruel and cold-hearted person.

"Of course you are." I say in a bored tone. Kobato-chan comes back and, so very carefully, sets my order of tea on the table. "Ah, thanks, Kobato-chan."

Kobato nods and smiles brightly. "Let me know if there's anything else you need, ok?" She leaves to help another table.

I bring the cup to my lips and take a sip. "You never told me what happened…" Yuui-sensei asks again, his tone a mix between worry and agitation.

"Why should I?"

"Because I'm worried."

"And?"

"You're one of my students. And a good friend. Why shouldn't I worry?"

My eye twitches. One of his students? A friend? So he felt obligated to worry now? How nice of him. "Feh, well, don't." I stand up from my spot. "I don't need your so-called worry." I practically snarl out those words. "You can take whatever concern your feeling and shove it. Because I don't fucking need it."

I wonder what possessed me to say such things. Maybe this whole situation has made me cynical over whether or not people actually care about me. I don't know anymore. But one thing's for sure, I wasn't about to let Yuui-sensei get whatever he wanted. Not now. Not ever.

An agitated sigh leaves my mouth. "I'm fine. Don't worry, ok?" I finally say in a much calmer tone. I call Kobato over and pay for the tea. Turning back to Yuui-sensei, I promise, "Everything's fine now." But the look on Yuui-sensei's face told me that he knew I was lying.

"Later, sensei."

* * *

That's all folks. For now. Will there be more? Who knows. I tend to leave ALOT of my stories unfinished. Which is a terrible habit to have. *sigh*

Syaoron - 'How OoC.'

Me - 'Gah, I'm sorry. It's just frustrating. I want to just write pure ansty feelings for you, ok?'

Syaoron - 'I guess.'

Me - 'I don't have a Beta who understands Horitsuba like I do to check on the personality for me. Plus, we don't get to see much into your personality in the Drama CDs or Omakes. You appear for like… two minutes as most?'

Syaoron - 'You tried... at least.'

Me - 'At least! What's that supposed to mean! *pinch Syaoron's cheek*'

Syaoron - 'Itai! Itai!'

Me - 'Now that I think on it... You're horribly sarcastic in this story.'

Ah, well, anyways. I hope this hasn't been too confusing now. Til next time?


End file.
